There and Back...AGAIN

Published on 27 August 2025 at 14:31

There and Back...AGAIN ~

I know, I know...some of you are probably thinking about the movie "The Hobbit" or "Lord of the rings". Which are incredible movies.

Sometimes, I feel my life is like a movie...albeit more of a horror show...(yeah thought about spelling that word differently)...but real life nightmares shall suffice.

If I was a wizard, I would definitely be shouting "You shall not pass" almost daily.

I can relate to people when they say one person abused them or even two, but I spent almost five years being abused by three family members. Trust me there were many many times I thought I was being punished by God.

Although I am a survivor, it wasn't easy, having your adopted family use you.

Most people can't imagine the torment, pain, abuse I was put through, and I still believe in God, Which sometimes isn't easy.

Even to this day, I always, expect the worse, and if something good does happen, I shrug it off as well not everything has a unpleasant ending. Sometimes the scars we have are embedded for life.

Which brings me to having written my first book which will be published by next week, The past several years I have been desperately searching for a way to lessen my "interesting" thoughts.

So my husband and I have written a book which alleviates a lot of my negative energy and thoughts about the extreme trauma I endured.

So What Is Mindfulness?

The simplest definition comes from Jon Kabat-Zinn, who introduced mindfulness into modern medicine:

“Mindfulness is awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, and without judgment.”

Let’s break that down:

Awareness: Simply noticing what’s happening inside you (thoughts, emotions, sensations) and around you (sounds, sights, textures).
On purpose: You’re not drifting or running on autopilot. You choose to pay attention.
In the present moment: Instead of replaying the past or worrying about the future, you land in now.
Without judgment: You don’t label your thoughts or feelings as “good” or “bad.” You just notice.

When you’ve experienced abuse, this kind of gentle awareness can be life-changing because trauma often pulls you into two painful places:

The past — replaying what happened, feeling stuck in old patterns.
The future — fearing what might happen, scanning for danger.

Mindfulness offers an alternative: a return to the present, one breath at a time, in a way that feels safe and manageable.

Why Mindfulness Matters for Survivors

Abuse often leaves behind deep emotional imprints—hypervigilance, anxiety, flashbacks, self-doubt. The body and mind learn to live in survival mode, always scanning for threat. Mindfulness interrupts that cycle. Here’s how:

Grounding: It helps you anchor in the here and now, so you don’t get swept away by memories or “what ifs.”
Self-regulation: It teaches your nervous system how to come out of fight-or-flight mode.
Empowerment: It gives you choice. Instead of reacting automatically, you can respond intentionally.
Reconnection: It helps you feel safe in your body again—a place that may not have felt like home for a long time.

Mindfulness doesn’t erase trauma, but it creates space between you and your experiences. You learn: “I have thoughts, but I am not my thoughts. I have feelings, but I am not my feelings. I can observe without being overwhelmed.”

I have included a detailed workbook inside guiding you step by step on how to use mindfulness to assist you in overcoming your fears and vastly benefit your relationships. I am currently adding bonus sections on to help you adopt and transform your life!

Prayers,

Mandie & Curtis

If you are reading this, it means you’ve endured something no one should ever have to face—sexual abuse or assault. You’ve carried pain that was never yours to bear. You’ve survived moments that could have broken you, yet here you are, still searching for light. That speaks volumes about your strength.

I wrote this book for you—for every woman and man who has felt violated, silenced, or stripped of their sense of safety. For every survivor who has struggled to trust again, to feel whole again, to believe in life beyond the trauma.

Let me say this clearly: What happened to you was not your fault. You did not deserve the humiliation, the fear, the coercion, or the cruelty. The pain inflicted upon you does not define who you are. You are more than what was done to you—you are resilient, you are worthy, and you are capable of creating a life that feels safe, joyful, and meaningful.

This book is not a quick fix. Healing is not linear, and it’s not about forgetting the past. It’s about reclaiming your power in the present. The practices you’ll find here—especially mindfulness—have the potential to transform the way you relate to your thoughts, emotions, and body. They’ve helped me rebuild my own life after trauma, and I believe they can help you, too.

Mindfulness is not just a buzzword. It’s a tool for survival, for grounding, and ultimately for thriving. It helps you:

Calm your nervous system when anxiety or flashbacks take over.
Create emotional safety by reconnecting with the present moment.
Release shame and self-blame and replace them with compassion and acceptance.
Build trust in yourself again—one breath, one choice at a time.
Find joy in small moments, even when the big picture still feels hard.

This book offers gentle, practical steps to help you feel more centered, more in control, and more hopeful. It won’t erase what happened, but it will give you tools to navigate the pain, soften its grip, and create space for healing and growth.

You deserve that. You deserve peace, love, and safety. You deserve to live, not just survive.

My prayer is that these pages give you more than strategies—they give you a sense of possibility. That you can heal. That you can thrive. That the best parts of your story are still unwritten.

There and Back...AGAIN